Dreams of Cheese
by Kaotac
Summary: A rewrite of The Prank.


With a clatter, crash and a bang, a large chest fell to the ground in one of Shallam's back streets. Just above the alley, flying in a chariot pulled by demonic goats stood a tall man, wearing a sleeveless hooded cloak, and laughing his head off before making his way speedily out of Shallam.

In the morning, many Shallamites woke to their telepathic Citizen's channel going crazy with chatter.

"What's this about a chest?"

"Where's the chest?"

"Has anyone tried to open the chest?"

About an hour after dawn, a Priest by the name of Dresden appeared and took charge "There's nothing to see here, move along, get going, HOLY CRAP IN A HAT! Who put this chest here?! Everyone crowd around, crowd around!"

She was just about to open it when someone shouted "WAIT! There's writing on the side! What does it say?" Dresden turned her head around and squinted down at the text.

"Elium gatron iun.. It's Mhun, it says 'Do not open' damn it I want to know what's inside! Oh well, we'll have to leave it. Off you go, everyone!"

So the crowd dispersed, leaving an upset looking Dresden on the scene. After about half an hour of brooding about the unknown, she went up to it and almost opened it, thought better and cast a locking spell before finally walking away angrily.

Meanwhile, in Delos, a tall Mhun with a sleveless, hooded cloak covering his face, paced

around a padded room and talked to himself.

"What's taking so long. I know them, they should be opening it by now! But where are the shouts of outrage? Where are the teams of Shallamese banging on the door? Where is the prank?!" he angrilly questioned, and punched one of the padded walls in a childish display of anger.

Sending a telepathic message to his guild mates, he asked "Anyone know what's going on with that chest? Strange thing, that," making sure not to put suspicion on himself.

A voice in his head told him, "Dresden sent everyone away and put some kind of charm on it, so it can't be opened. I wonder whats in it?" That caused him to look around with slight worry, as he never could tell if the voices were his guild mates, or just voices in his head.

"Probably nothing. Someone playing on their paranoia, most like," he replied and closed the link.

Continuing to talk to himself, he said "It's almost night.. I'm sure someone will open it," at which point he started cackling, which quickly led into a hacking cough

A small female voice asked with worry, "Lordfather alright? This one worried. Cough not good at your age!"

As night crept across Shallam, a dark figure emerged from the shadows, slowly creeping up on the chest. Their hands moved around in the air, which removed the locking spell on the mysterious object. With it unlocked, the figure opened the lid.

All of a sudden, a large blob of goo rushed out and dragged the dark figure into the streets of Shallam.

In short order, shouts started to fill the air from the direction of Shallam.

"What is this?!"

"What is what? AAARGH!"

"Where did this stuff come from?"

"It's gooey!"

The sky suddenly lit up with fireworks, spelling out a message for the people of the city.

"YOU HAVE BEEN PRANKED BY... K-A-H-L-E-S-S WITH HELP FROM... D-R-E-S-D-E-N!"

In Delos, the dark figure responsible for the creation of the chest was in an observatory when people started shouting.

"KAHLESS!! What the hell did you do?!" came the first one.

The figure pulled down his hood to reveal a slightly tanned Tsol'aa with silver hair and golden eyes.

"Who opened it?" he asked by shouting in return.

"Dresden," was the reply, which caused Kahless to fall to his knees, and grip himself around the middle as he started laughing loudly.

"It's just cheese, it'll wash off..." he shouted again.

The answer he got came very quickly, "But the smell!"

He tried not to laugh, but didn't have much luck as he replied, "I knew you would thank me for that. Quite an improvement, yes?"

Unable to hold it in any longer, he fell to the ground, laughing and tuned the shouts out.

Suddenly the door made a loud crash as it was flung open and a very small person ran into the room with Kahless and shrieked "Lordfather, the evilbad cheese! This one is covered in it! CHRR!!"

An old man shot up in his bed upon a fishing boat, docked on an island far from Sapience. Wiping the sleep from his eyes, he laughed lightly as he shook his head. "Oh how I miss the old days.. Perhaps I should make a trip back to the continent?" he mused aloud to himself.


End file.
